Should the Retirement Age Be Raised?
A complete IELTS General Training Writing Task 2 question with a model answer of 309 words, plus a breakdown of the sentence structures, cohesive devices and vocabulary that answer uses. Write your own version first, then compare.
Written by Manish Sharma · CELTA and DELTA qualified · 8 years teaching IELTS
Score my answer to this questionThe question
You have 40 minutes. Write at least 250 words.
As people are living longer, some argue that the retirement age should be raised so that workers contribute to society for more years. Others believe that the retirement age should stay the same or even be reduced. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 words.
How to approach it
- 01Discuss both perspectives fully before introducing your own opinion
- 02Use concrete examples — name specific industries or worker groups affected
- 03Avoid extreme positions; a measured middle-ground stance typically scores higher
- 04Use precise vocabulary: 'pension sustainability', 'physically demanding occupations', 'partial retirement'
- 05Make your opinion consistent throughout the essay — state it in the introduction and reinforce in the conclusion
- 06Use cohesive devices: 'On the other hand', 'In my opinion', 'In conclusion'
Model answer
309 words in 5 paragraphs. Read it after you have written your own, not before: the point of a model answer is to show you what you missed, and you cannot miss anything you have not attempted.
Across many developed countries, rising life expectancy has prompted heated debate over whether the official retirement age should be increased. Supporters argue that longer lifespans justify longer working lives, while opponents fear that such reforms ignore the realities of physical and mental decline. In my view, a flexible approach that allows people to retire on their own terms is preferable to a single, raised retirement age.
Those in favour of raising the retirement age point to several pressing economic and social pressures. As populations age, fewer workers are left to support a growing number of retirees through pension and healthcare systems. Pushing the retirement age higher helps governments balance their books and ensures that pensions remain sustainable for future generations. Furthermore, many older workers possess invaluable experience and continue to make meaningful contributions to their organisations well into their sixties and seventies.
On the other hand, opponents argue that not everyone benefits equally from longer lifespans. Workers in physically demanding jobs — construction, manufacturing, nursing, and farming — often experience health problems by their early sixties and cannot reasonably be expected to continue. Raising the retirement age uniformly therefore penalises those whose bodies wear out fastest, while white-collar professionals can comfortably work for years more. Some economists also warn that keeping older workers in employment may reduce opportunities for younger entrants.
In my opinion, the most sensible solution is to offer flexibility rather than imposing a uniform increase. Workers in less physically demanding occupations could be encouraged or incentivised to retire later, while those in strenuous roles should retain the right to retire earlier without penalty. Partial retirement schemes, where people reduce hours gradually, could ease the transition for everyone.
In conclusion, while extending working lives makes economic sense in principle, a one-size-fits-all increase ignores important differences between occupations. A flexible, individual-led approach offers a fairer and more sustainable path forward.
What this answer actually does
Measured from the text above, and compared against the other 69 answers of the same type in this library. These are counts, not band scores: they describe what the writing does, which is the part you can copy.
18 more than the median answer for this task type
12 words at the shortest, 28 at the longest
2 more than the median answer for this task type
carry a subordinate or relative clause
Sentence rhythm
Sentences average 19.3 words and vary by 4.2 words either side of that, running from 12 words to 28. Variation is the point. Grammatical Range and Accuracy rewards a mix of simple and complex sentences, and an answer where every sentence is the same length reads as flat no matter how correct it is. 9 of the 16 sentences here carry a subordinate or relative clause.
The cohesive devices it uses
8 in total, spread across 4 different functions. Range matters more than count: an answer that opens every paragraph with a sequencer signals its structure but never signals a relationship between ideas, and Coherence and Cohesion is marked on both.
on the other hand, while
furthermore
therefore
in conclusion
Vocabulary and repetition
Ignoring grammar words, 80 per cent of the content words in this answer are distinct, and 67 per cent appear exactly once. Lexical Resource is where repetition costs the most marks, and the usual cause is not a small vocabulary but reaching for the same noun every time the topic is named.
The longest run of words copied straight from the question is 4 words. Examiners discount wording lifted from the question, so a short run here is the right outcome: the answer restates the topic in its own words rather than borrowing the question's.
What you are marked on
All four criteria carry equal weight, and your Writing band is their average rounded to the nearest half band.
Task Response
Address both views in depth and provide a clear, consistent personal opinion with supporting reasons.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a clear paragraph structure with effective topic sentences and a range of linkers.
Lexical Resource
Use precise vocabulary on labour, demographics, and economics with strong collocations.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy
Demonstrate a range of complex grammatical structures with high accuracy.
You have read one model answer. Now get one marked.
Paste your own attempt at this question and get a band for each criterion, with the exact sentences costing you marks.
Score my answer